10 - Life is sexually transmitted.
09 - Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
08 - Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.
07 - Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.
06 - Some people are like a Slinky.....not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs.
05 - Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.
04 - All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.
03 - Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars and a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents?
02 - In the 60s, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.
01 - We know exactly where one cow with Mad-cow-disease is located among the millions and millions of cows in America but we haven't got a clue as to where thousands of Illegal immigrants and Terrorists are located. Maybe we should put the Department of Agriculture in charge of immigration.
No comments:
Post a Comment